Odd Cheeses of Britain

Customer: Well, eh, how about a little red Leicester?

Wensleydale: I'm, afraid we're fresh out of red Leicester, sir.

Customer: Oh, never mind, how are you on Tilsit?

Wensleydale: I'm afraid we never have that at the end of the week, sir, we get it fresh on Monday.

Customer: Tish tish. No matter. Well, stout yeoman, four ounces of Caerphilly, if you please.

Wensleydale: Ah! It's been on order, sir, for two weeks. Was expecting it this morning.

Customer: Tis not my lucky day, is it? Aah, Bel Paese?

Wensleydale: Sorry, sir.

Customer: Red Windsor?

Wensleydale: Normally, sir, yes. Today the van broke down.

Customer: Ah. Stilton?

Wensleydale: Sorry.

Customer: Emmenthal? Gruyere?

Wensleydale: No.

…

Well, I guess the Customer should have just asked for some of these.

Baron Bigod 

• From:  Suffolk
• Type: brie-like
• Name:  after Baron Hugh Bigod, a local “12th-century rogue nobleman”

Cornish Yarg 

• From:  Cornwall
• Type: semi-soft, wrapped in nettle leaves,
• Name:  “yarg” is “gray” (the last name of the couple who created it) spelled backwards

Crowdie

• From:  Scotland
• Type:  fresh, soft
• Note:  often turned into the dessert cranachan

Dorset Drum

• From:  Dorset
• Type: cheddar
• Name:  made in the shape of a cylinder … in Dorset!
• Note:  no longer produced

Duddleswell

• From:  Sussex
• Type:  goat
• Name:  local village (“spring of a man named Dudda”)

Farleigh Wallop

• From:  Hampshire
• Type:  semi-soft goat
• Name:  local village (“fern-covered clearing,” plus home of the Wallop [“stream valley”] family)

Their actual home

Fine Fettle Yorkshire

• From:  Yorkshire
• Type:  feta-like
• Name:  originally “feta,” changed because of EU rules 

Goosnargh Gold

• From:  Lancashire
• Type: Double Gloucester
• Name:  local village (“the hill pasture of a man named Gusan”)

Grimbister

• From:  Orkney
• Type:  fresh, farmhouse style
• Name:  local village (“farm of a man named Grim”)

Gruth Dhu

• From:  Scotland
• Type:  Crowdie (see above), mixed with double cream, and rolled in black pepper & oatmeal
• Name:  Scots for “curdy black”
• Note:  also known as Black Crowdie

Hereford Hop

• From:  Hereford
• Type:  mature cheddar
• Name:  rolled in toasted hops

Lincolnshire Poacher

• From:  Lincolnshire
• Type:  cheddar/Alpine-style mix
• Name:  probably from the traditional English folk song

Little Wallop

• From:  Hampshire
• Type:  goat, wrapped in vine leaves
• Name:  after Farleigh Wallop

Lymeswold

• From:  Somerset
• Type:  bleu, with edible rind
• Name:  winner of a contest
• Note:  no longer produced

Merry Wyfe

• From:  Bath
• Type:  Gouda-like, washed in cider
• Name:  a variant of Wyfe of Bath, from the character in the Canterbury Tales

Pantysgawn

• From:  Wales
• Type:  goat
• Name:  after farm where it was first made (Welsh for “valley of the hawthorns”)

Parlick Fell

• From:  Lancashire
• Type:  sheep
• Name:  hill where sheep are raised (“par” is from “pear”; “lick” and “fell” mean “hill”)

Renegade Monk

• From:  Somerset
• Type:  bleu, washed in ale
• Name:  nickname for Knights Templar, who lived nearby

Suffolk Bang

• From:  Suffolk
• Type:  “low-quality”
• Name:  “named for its poor quality and high density. The name refers to the cheese being so solid it could ‘bang’ or make a loud noise.”  [Google AI]
• Note:  no longer produced

Stinking Bishop

• From:  Gloucestershire
• Type:  pungent, washed in perry (pear cider)
• Name:  after the farmer, Frederick Bishop, who created a pear used for the perry
• Note:  made famous by mention in Wallace and Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit

Y Fenni

• From:  Wales
• Type:  mature cheddar, with mustard seeds & ale
• Name:  short for Abergavenny, the local market town

NCAA Div I – Your Mascot Is Not as It Seems

Me and the missus were catching some hoops the other day. In particular, we were watching Duke vs. Siena.

Siena are the Saints, but their mascot appears to be a St Bernard. We got to talking about other colleges in the same situation – Georgetown, Navy, UNC …

Well, that just wasn’t good enough for yours truly. Hence this post.

NOTE:  Div I schools only. There were enough of those as is!

Aggies

Before we deal with anything else, we’ve got to address the Aggie issue first.

What the heck is an Aggie? Well, the dictionary is telling me it’s a kind of marble. It’s also saying it’s someone from a land grant college – i.e., one that focused on practical matters, such as agriculture, engineering, the military, and so on.

These schools often had the term “agricultral” in their name – Texas A&M, NC A&T … It wasn’t much of a leap to call students “aggies,” and then to name their teams aas such as well.

This even extended to land grants schools that did not have “agricultural” in their names – UC Davis, Utah State, New Mexico State …

So, what does an “aggie” actually look like?

• Texas A&M – collie
• NCA&T – bulldog

• New Mexico State – cowboy
• Utah State – bull
• UC Davis – horse

 

People?

Most mascots are animals, though plenty are people as well. Now, most of the latter are pretty easy to turn into mascots – knights, vikings, pirates, devils, whatever.

Some of those, though, are a little bit harder. What, for instance, should a volunteer look like? How about an islander? A hilltopper?

• Univ Texas Arlington – Mavericks (horse)
• Univ Nebraska Omaha – Mavericks (bull)

• Wright State – Raiders (wolf)
• Loyola Chicago – Ramblers (wolf)
• Middle Tenn State – Red Raiders (horse)
• Utah Tech – Trailblazers (bison)
• Siena – Saints (St Bernard)

• Navy – Midshipmen (ram)
• Western Illinois – Leathernecks (bulldog)
• Western Kentucky – Hilltoppers (??? – “designed to embody the ‘hill’ of the Hilltoppers name”)

• Texas A&M Corpus Christi – Islanders (??? – “designed to represent the ‘coastal lifestyle’ of Corpus Christi”)

• Longwood – Lancers (horse)
  NOTE:  A lancer was a cavalryman armed with a lance, or spear
  
  
• VMI – Keydet (mule)
  NOTE:  “Keydet” is a play on “cadet”
  
  
• Tennessee – Volunteer (dog)
  NOTE:  From the number of volunteers from the state who signed up for the War of 1812
  
  
• UC Fullerton – Titans (elephant)
• Univ of Detroit Mercy – Titans (centurion)

 

Royals

A subset of the people category are mascots having to do with the aristocratic titles we ditched so definitively way back in 1776.

• Queens – Royals (lion)
• Old Dominion – Monarchs (lion)

• Duquesne – Dukes (lion)
• James Madison – Dukes (bulldog)
  
  
• Univ San Francisco – Dons (bull)
  NOTE:  A “don” is a Spanish nobleman (reflecting the Spanish founding of San Francisco)

If you’re wondering why so many of these teams went with lions – well, they are the “kings of the jungle.”

 

Injuns

Yup, what used to be a very popular source of mascots is now politically incorrect. If you didn’t already change your mascot altogether – Dartmouth, Stanford, St John’s – I guess you could at least come up with something a little more inncouous for the on-field version.

• William & Mary – Tribe (griffin)
  NOTE:  A griffin is a mythological creatures combining the traits of a lion & an eagle

• Bradley – Braves (gargoyle)

• Alcorn State – Braves (hawk)
• Illinois – Fighting Illini (kingfisher)
• Utah – Utes (hawk)

State-Specific

If you’re from North Carolina, you’re a Tar Heel. If from Indiana, a Hoosier. What exactly do those things look like though?

• UNC – Tarheels (ram)
• Indiana – Hoosiers (bison)
• Oklahoma – Sooners (horse)
• Louisiana Lafayette – Ragin’ Cajuns (hot pepper)

• Tarleton State – Texans (duck)

Colors

Before all the eagles and bulldogs and tigers, teams were often named after the colors they wore. The prime example here is Harvard, home of the Crimson. Unfortunately, they don’t really have an official mascot. Here are some that do:

• Alabama – Crimson Tide (elephant)

• Cornell – Big Red (bear)
• Stanford – Cardinal (tree)

• St Francis – Red Flashes (monk)
• Univ North Texas – Mean Green (eagle)
• Kent State – Gold Flashes (eagle)

 

Weather

Yes, weather can be frightening. Now, I’m not talking about sunny summer days or gentle spring showers. How, though, to represent lighting, thunder, tornadoes or hurricanes?

• Iowa State – Cyclones (cardinal)
• Miami – Hurricanes (stork)

• St John’s – Red Storm (thunderbird)

 

Various Stuff

• Univ of Illinois Chicago – Flames (dragon)
• Liberty – Flames (eagle)
• Valparaiso – Beacons (dog)

• Cal State Long Beach – Beach (shark)
• Indiana State – Sycamores (??? – “a furry, blue and white creature designed to represent the school, not a specific animal”)

 

 

What the Heck Is It?

It’s hard to come up with a good mascot when you don’t even know what your team name’s supposed to be.

• Univ Alabama Birmingham – Blazers (dragon)
• Univ Tennessee Chattanooga – Mocs (mockingbird)

• St Bonaventure – Bonnies (wolf)
• St Thomas – Tommies (wildcat)
  
  
• Akron – Zips (kangaroo)
  NOTE:  Winner of a student contest, referring “to ‘Zippers,’ a brand of popular rubber overshoes produced by Akron's B.F. Goodrich Company”

• VPI – Hokies (turkey)
  NOTE:  From a cheer; no relation to turkeys that I can uncover

• Georgetown – Hoyas (bulldog)
  NOTE:  From a cheer, in Latin no less: Hoya saxa, “What rocks [these men are]”

 

 

Oddly Named Historical Events

Famous historian Arnold Toynbee once called history “one damn thing after another.” Indeed, there sure are a lot of things that have happened in the couple of thousand years of recorded history. It only stands to reason that some of those many events might have been given some less-than-conventional names. 

For example, you may well have heard of the following:

• Bay of Pigs Invasion
• Beer Hall Putsch
• Tennis Court Oath
• Whiskey Rebellion
• Zoot Suit Riots

Here are some more, less-well-known events. Enjoy!

Batman’s Treaty

• Parties:  Brits & Aborigines 
• Date:  1835
• Location:  Australia
• Significance:  settlement of Melbourne
• NOTE:  Batman was the last name of one of the settlers

Bread and Cheese Revolt

• Parties:  peasants vs. nobles
• Date:  1491-1492
• Location:  Netherlands
• Significance:  put down

Coconut War

• Parties:  separatists vs. government
• Date:  1980
• Location:  Vanuatu
• Significance:  rebellion put down

Convention of Moss

• Parties:  Sweden & Norway
• Date:  1814
• Location:  Moss, Norway (town of 30,700 people just down the fjord from Oslo)
• Significance:  ceasefire; provided the basis for personal union of the 2 countries that lasted until 1905

In this little building right here!

Defenestration of Prague

• Parties:  Protestants vs. Catholics
• Date:  1618
• Location:  Czechia
• Significance:  began the 30 Years War
• NOTE:  “Defenestration” means throwing someone out of a window (in this case, delegates of the Habsburgs – they survived by landing on a dung heap)

Diet of Worms

• Parties:  Protestants vs. Catholics
• Date:  1521
• Location:  Worms, Germany (city of 85,000 on the Rhine)
• Significance:  Martin Luther is branded a heretic
• NOTE:  A "diet" is just a kind of legislative assembly

Dirty War

• Parties:  military junta vs. its own citizens
• Date:  1974-1983
• Location:  Argentina
• Significance:  Up to 30,000 people may have been "disappeared"

Football War

• Parties:  El Salvador vs. Honduras
• Date:  1969
• Location:  border between the 2 countries
• Significance:  began with riots at World Cup qualifying match; ended in ceasefire 4 days later

Friso-Drentic War

• Parties:  Bishop of Utrecht (with Frisian army) vs. province of Drenthe
• Date:  1228-1233
• Location:  Netherlands
• Significance:  Drenths forced to build monastery; first of many more similar conflicts
• NOTE:  Spell check wants me to change "Drentic" to "Drastic"

Hook and Cod Wars

• Parties:  cities vs. nobles
• Date:  1350-1490
• Location:  Netherlands
• Significance:  who gets to be Count of Holland

Loon War

• Parties:  William of Frisia vs. sister Ada, Countess of Loon 
• Date:  1203-1206
• Location:  Netherlands
• Significance:  who gets to be Count of Holland (yup, again)

Probably not it

Operation Polo

• Parties:  India vs. princely state of Hyderabad
• Date:  1948
• Location:  India
• Significance:  Hyderabad absorbed into India
• NOTE:  The prince (nizam) was famous for his polo ponies

Pool War

• Parties:  rebels vs. government
• Date:  2016-2017
• Location:  Rep. of Congo
• Significance:  rebellion put down
• NOTE:  The "pool" refers to a wide part of the Congo River, where the events happened

Probably not it

Poor Conrad Rebellion

• Parties:  peasants vs. duke
• Date:  1514
• Location:  Wurttemberg, Germany
• Significance:  put down

Leader of the rebellion Peter Gaiss 

(Conrad was simply a common peasant name)

Punctation of Olmutz

• Parties:  Prussia & Austria
• Date:  1850
• Location:  Olomouc, Czechia
• Significance:  Prussia recognized Austria as the leader of the German Confederation
• NOTE”  “Punctation” denotes a preliminary treaty

The 2 emperors

 

Rebellion of Mayor Albert

• Parties:  burghers vs. duke
• Date:  1311-1312
• Location:  Krakow, Poland
• Significance:  put down

Second Peace of Thorn

• Parties:  Teutonic Knights vs. Poles
• Date:  1466
• Location:  Torun, Poland (pop. 197,000)
• Significance:  ended the Thirteen Years’ War
• NOTE:  First Peace of Thorn ended the Polish-Lithuanian-Teutonic War, 55 years earlier

The actual treaty

Singing Revolution

• Parties:  Baltic states vs. Soviet Union
• Date:  1987-1991
• Location:  Estonia, Latvia & Lithuania
• Significance:  independence of Baltic states
• NOTE:  “Public song festivals became a key element of resistance, as tens of thousands of participants sang national and folk songs in mass gatherings, blending cultural revival with political protest.” [Wikipedia]

Smoked Meat Rebellion 

• Parties:  Indians vs. settlers
• Date:  1909
• Location:  Oklahoma
• Significance:  put down
• NOTE:  Sparked by alleged stealing of smoked meat by Indians

Crazy Snake, leader of the rebellion

Subjugation of Jambi

• Parties:  colonials vs. natives
• Date:  1901-1907
• Location:  Indonesian province
• Significance:  area brought under colonial control

Not to be confused with genie from Pee-wee Herman Show

Upper Yafa Disturbances

• Parties:  Brits vs. natives
• Date:  1959
• Location:  Yemen province
• Significance:  rebellion put down (with no casualties!)

Upper Yafa flag

War of Hum

• Parties:  Bosnia vs. Serbia
• Date:  1326-1329
• Location:  Bosnia
• Significance:  annexation of Hum (Zachlumia) by Bosnians

War of Jenkins’ Ear

• Parties:  Spain & Great Britain
• Date:  1739-1748
• Location:  Caribbean
• Significance:  related to the War of Austrian Succession, which ended with the Treaty of Aix-la-Chapelle
• NOTE:  “The name derives from Robert Jenkins, a British sea captain whose ear was allegedly severed in April 1731 by Spanish coast guards searching his ship for contraband.” [Wikipedia]

War of the Cow

• Parties:  Liege vs. Namur
• Date:  1272-1278
• Location:  France
• Significance:  started as a dispute over a stolen cow

War of the Golden Stool

• Parties:  Brits vs. Ashanti
• Date:  1900
• Location:  Ghana
• Significance:  annexation of Ashanti kingdom
• NOTE:  The Golden Stool was basically the throne of the kingdom

War of the Insane

• Parties:  Hmong vs. French
• Date:  1918-1921
• Location:  Indochina
• Significance:  rebellion against excessive taxation; put down
• NOTE:  Hmong adopted many magical beliefs, making them appear “insane” to the French

Rebel leader Vue Pa Chay

War of the Sicilian Vespers

• Parties:  everybody
• Date:  1282-1302
• Location:  Italy
• Significance:  who gets to rule Sicily
• NOTE:  Uprising started at evening prayers (i.e., vespers)

War of the Three Sanchos

• Parties:  Castile (Sancho II) vs. Navarre (Sancho IV) vs. Aragon (Sancho Ramirez)
• Date:  1065-1067
• Location:  Spain
• Significance:  how the kingdom of Sancho the Great (the 3 Sanchos’ father) would be divided

Also a board game (?!?!)

War of the Two Peters

• Parties:  Castile vs. Aragon
• Date:  1356-1369
• Location:  Spain
• Significance:  which Peter would rule Castile

Peter the Cruel / Pedro IV / Pedro Sanchez

Years of Lead

• Parties:  far left vs. far right vs. government
• Date:  1968-1984
• Location:  Italy
• Significance:  terrorism 
• NOTE:  similarly named events in Brazil, Morocco & Italy

Also a rock band (?!?!)