Odd Soccer Trophies

I’m sure everyone’s familiar with the Ballon d’Or. You might even be aware that it’s French for “golden ball.” How many other individual awards are you familiar with though?

There are plenty of them. And some of them sound a little odd – at least to my American, English-speaking ears. No, wait, my ears don’t speak English. My English-hearing ears, maybe? Nah, that’s not right. English-understanding ears? Ah,  you know what I mean.

So, here they are. Let me know if they crack you up as much as they crack up me. Huh, that didn’t sound right either …

Golden Shoe
Europe

You might know this one better as the Golden Boot, which does indeed sound a little more classy.

It’s for the top scorer in the major European leagues. Lionel Messi has won it 6 times. The latest winner is Robert Lewandoski.

Because the award used to include all European leagues, winners have also included folks like Tanju Colak (Turkey), Sotiris Kaiafas (Cyprus), Hans Krankl (Austria) & Zviad Endeladze (Georgia), 

Silver Ball (Palone d’Argento / Bola de Prata) 
World Cup / Italy / Brazil / Portugal

Yup, this one is given for the World Cup and in three countries.

For the World Cup, it’s given to the second highest scorer. It’s been around since 1982, with the last three winners being Kylian Mbappe, Eden Hazard & Thomas Muller.

The Italian award was for Serie A players who demonstrated talent, fairness & moral character. It was awarded from 2000 to 2017. Andrea Pirlo, Kaka & Francesco Totti were some of the winners I recognized.

In Brazil, it’s still around, and is for the top player at each position. Since that means 11 players per year, that gives us such wonderfully named players as Socrates, Leonardo, Picasso, Bismarck, Manga, Bobo, Dudu, Biro-Biro, Junior, Baby & Hulk.

In Portugal, it’s for the top scorer. Eusebio tops all winners with 7. He also won 5 consecutive titles, another record. The current holder is Darwin Nunez.

Golden Glove
World Cup / Premier League

No, this has nothing to do with boxing. Or baseball.

The World Cup award goes back to 1994, and was originally named after Soviet great Lev Yashin. Since this one is so new, I know all but one of the 8 winners. Emiliano Martinez, with Argentina, won the last one. It is, of course, awarded to the best boxer ... er, goalie.

The Premier League award goes back to 2004, and is based on the total number of clean sheets. Joe Hart, with Manchester City, has won it a record 4 times. Ederson, also with City, is the current holder, and has 3 titles himself. Damn Blues!

Bronze Ball
World Cup

What’s that expression again? Oh, balls of brass. Never mind.

As with the Olympics, bronze represents third place. In this particular instance, it’s for the third best all-around player. Winners include stars like Maradona, Andrea Pirlo, Antoine Griezmann & the current holder, Luka Modric.

There is a similar award for the Club World Cup as well. It features some stars, like Neymar, Xavi, Ronaldinho & Andres Iniesta. There seem to be plenty of total unknowns, though, as well: Gaku Shibasaki (Japan), Jonathan Urretaviscaya (Uruguay), Mouhcine Iajour (Morocco) …

Looks like it’s also a thing in plumbing (a kind of valve)

Azure Football (Pallone Azzuro)
Italy

Well, this is certainly preferable to the Blue Ball Award. 

This one’s voted on by the Italian national team’s fan club. Winners include Andrea Pirlo and Gianluigi Buffon. It’s only been awarded 6 times, and not since 2021. There’s also a women’s, futsal & beach soccer version.

Thank you, Google Images

Football Oscar
Croatia

Not sure if there’s a Football Emmy, Football Grammy, or Football Tony award. But you get the idea.

This should really be called the Football Oscars, as awards are given for best player, team, goalie, manager and under-21. 

Best player includes one for any Croatian and one for the best player in the Croatian national league, the HNL. Not too surprisingly, Luka Modrich has won that first one all 10 years the award has been in place. 

All the rest are HNL exclusively. And, yes, these include a ton of guys no one’s ever heard of before, and whose name all end in “ic.”

And then there’s this guy

Giant-Killing Award
FA Cup

Given to the best Jack in soccer for that year. Last year’s winner was Jack Grealish. Previous winners have included Jack Charlton, Jack Wilshire, and Jack Butland.

Seriously, though, this award is given to the team in the FA Cup who posts the most unlikely win in that year’s tournament. Winners include Crawley Town (against Derby), Luton Town (against Norwich), Swindon Town (against Wigan), and Bradford City (against Chelsea!).

Too bad this is no longer around. It only really lasted from 2011 to 2019.

It’s also a Japanese manga series

Golden Bench (Panchina d’Oro)
Italy

It’s for managers, so I guess they had to come up with something. And I’m guessing the Golden Whistle, Golden Clipboard, Golden Suit, or Golden Puffy Jacket just weren’t making it.

Winners include such well-known names as Carlo Ancelotti, Antonio Conte, Roberto Mancini & Jose Mourinho (wait, how did he get in there?). There is a Silver Bench (for the next league down), women’s award, futsal award, Special Golden Bench, Lifetime Achievement Golden Bench, Special Award for Enhancing Young Players, Positive Message Award, Mino Favini Award & Best Supporting Hairstylist in an International Musical Documentary Short. 

Okay, so I made that last one up.

Obviously, the silliest looking award out there

Golden Boy
Europe

Ya gotta wonder, is there a Silver Boy and a Bronze Boy as well?

This one, dating back to 2003, is a veritable roll call of stars. I’m talking Messi, Rooney, Pogba, Mbappe, Haaland … Of course, there are also a few who didn’t really pan out in the same way: Anderson (yup, that’s his full name), Isco (ditto) & Alexandre Pato. It’s for the best up-and-coming player.

No, he was not a winner

Golden Talent of Ukraine
Ukraine

Is “golden” really an adjective you can use with “talent”? Not according to Google at least.

Of course, I am getting some hits. It’s for some pretty weird stuff though. I mean, the 2nd hit is for an Egyptian recruiting agency. And the 1st gives me an Instagram error page.

As for soccer, we’ve got two awards, one for under 21 and one for under 19. There are monthly awards and an annual one as well. The winners get “diplomas, game shoes and watches.”

Seeing as there are 25 awards given every year, there are plenty of opportunities for funny names, both for individuals (Mykola Matviyenko, Heorhiy Tsitaishvili) and clubs (FC Dnipro Dnipropetrovsk, FC Kryvbas Kryvyi Rih).

Sadly, this one is currently suspended.

Pichichi Trophy
Spain

No, this is not named after a Pokemon character. 

It’s for the top goal scorer in Spain’s La Liga.

It’s named for Rafael (“Pichichi”) Moreno, a forward for Athletic Bilbao who played in the 1910s and 20s. He died young (29, of typhus), which is, of course, a great way to get yourself immortalized. Moreno was notable for the white cap he wore on the pitch. His nickname was due to his “slight build.” I don’t know Spanish well enough for that to make any sense to me, so I guess I’ll just have to take your word for it, Wikipedia.

This one’s been a thing since 1952, and was also rewarded retroactively all the way back to 1929

Not too surprisingly, Messi leads everyone with 8 awards all time.

And, of course, I’ve got some funny names for you. Let’s see, would Mundo, Bata, Pruden, Vava II & Quini do?

Yup, that’s him alright

Club 200 of Berador Abduraimov
Uzbekistan

No, this is not a disco in Tashkent.

To quote Wikipedia, “is club of the best goalscorers with over 200 goals in the history of Uzbek football.” It is named after “after the famous Pakhtakor player, Berador Abduraimov [italics mine].” 

Berador’s own entry tells me that “he is regarded as one of the best strikers and greatest football players in the history of Uzbek football.” That said, Word still wants me to change his first name to “Eardrop.” Go figure.

Oddly, this is a very exclusive club, with only 12 members (including our very own Berador, by the way). Guess they’re just leaving plenty of room to grow.

Yup, that’s him (if my Cyrillic is correct, that is).

Ebony Shoe
Belgium

Did something get lost in translation here? Maybe they meant to say “Black Boot.” Or perhaps “Inky Cleats“? “Sable sabot”? 

It’s called the Ebbenhouten schoen in Flemish, and the Soulier d'ébène in French, if that’s any help.

If you’re thinking this is for the best Belgian player (black is, of course, part of the Belgian flag), you’d be wrong. It’s actually for the best African player. Which, to me at least, sounds a tad non-PC.

There are actually 3 different levels. Gold, silver & bronze ebony shoes, if you will.

Winners include a couple of names I recognize (Vincent Kompany, Marouanne Felani, Romulu Lukaku), as well as plenty I don’t (Copa, Mido, Yaw Preko, Jean-Jacques Misse-Misse).

Interestingly, there are a number of winners who were born in Belgium. The award also includes winners from countries on either side of the Sahara – Egypt & the Ivory Coast, Algeria & Angola, Tunisia & Tanzania – as well as one from the Netherlands to boot.

You knew this was comin’, right?

Bronze Onze (Onze de Bronze)
France (Europe)

Hey, it rhymes (and sounds ridiculous) in two languages.

Okay, so first of all, what the heck is an “onze”? Well, my community college French is telling me that all that is is the number eleven. So, “Bronze Eleven”? Geez, that makes even less sense.

Well, Onze also just so happens to be a French sports magazine, specializing in soccer. Gonna go out on a limb and speculate that the number of players on a soccer team might be playing some kind of role here.

And it’s those folks who hand out awards every year for best European player and coach, with gold, silver & bronze levels. None of the names here should be unfamiliar this time.

Hard to believe, but the magazine also sponsors a best team, the Onze de Onze. What an excellent note to go out on.

I honestly have no idea