totally random garbage: Boston Red Sox

My wife and I are huge Red Sox fans. We watch other teams as well … at least when they play the Sox.

One of our favorite things to do is to spot ex-Sox on other teams. For the ones who are doing well for themselves, we invariably ask, “Why can’t we get players like that?”

What would it look like if the Sox kept onto their good players? I asked the same question to a little awhile back for my other favorite team, the Pirates. So, here it is … an ideal roster of current and former Sox who are currently active.

NOTE: Players on the current Sox roster are underlined.

Adley Rutschman

2026 highlights: 2.6 WAR, 13 HRs, 60 RBIs, All Star
Career highlights: 17.4 WAR, 290 RBIs, 303 runs, All Star (3), Silver Slugger
Who we gave up: minor leaguers

Whoops, wrong team!

Willson Contreras

2026 highlights: 4.6 WAR, 27 HRs, 81 RBIs, 275 BA, All Star
Career highlights: 33.9 WAR, 199 HRs, 629 RBIs, 594 runs, All Star (4)
Who we gave up: minor leaguers

Mookie Betts (Dodgers)

2026 highlights: 3.9 WAR, 23 HRs, 69 RBIs, 71 runs, All Star
Career highlights: 79 WAR, 288 BA, 314 HRs, 1237 runs, 982 RBIs, 198 SBs, MVP, All Star (8), Gold Glove (6), Silver Slugger (7)
Who we got: Connor Wong (0.5 WAR), others (retired)
Who’s out there instead: Nick Sogard (1.2 WAR)

If that baseball things doesn’t work out

Xander Boegarts (SD)

2026 highlights: 2.2 WAR, 68 runs, 22 SBs
Career highlights: 44.3 WAR, 283 BA, 210 HRs, 1016 runs, 895 RBIs, 148 SBs, All Star (4), Silver Slugger (5)
Who we got: zilch (free agent)
Who’s out there instead: Trevor Story (0.2 WAR)

Alex Bregman (Cubs)

2026 highlights: 5.8 WAR, 28 HRs, 93 RBIs, 92 runs, 22 SBs
Career highlights: 48.9 WAR, 271 BA, 237 HRs, 818 RBIs, 850 runs, All Star (3), Gold Glove, Silver Slugger
Who we got: zilch (free agent)
Who’s out there instead: Caleb Durbin (4.4 WAR)

Wilyer Abreu

2026 highlights: 5.9 WAR, 24 HRs, 76 RBIs, 81 runs
Career highlights: 13.5 WAR, 217 RBIs, 203 runs, Gold Glove (2)
Who we gave up: Christian Vazquez (0.4 WAR)

His other team

Ceddanne Rafaella

2026 highlights: 5.7 WAR, 283 BA, 70 RBIs, 67 runs, All Star
Career highlights: 13.6 WAR, 213 RBIs, 232 runs, 49 SBs, All Star, Gold Glove
Home-grown

His other team

Roman Anthony

2026 highlights: 1.3 WAR
Career highlights: 4.6 WAR, 271 BA
Home-grown

And his other team

Rafael Devers (SF)

2026 highlights: 3.6 WAR, 37 HRs, 98 RBIs, 88 runs
Career highlights: 30.6 WAR, 274 BA, 272 HRs, 845 RBIs, 803 runs, All Star (3), Silver Slugger (2)
Who we got: Kyle Harrison (0.5, Milwaukee), Jordan Hicks (0.7, White Sox), minor leaguers
Who’s out there instead: Masataka Yoshida (0.7 WAR)

Only if he means it

Chris Sale (SF)

2026 highlights: 5.5 WAR, 14-9, 200 Ks, 2.16 ERA, 0.984 WHIP
Career highlights: 62.7 WAR, 159-97, 2779 Ks, 2.95 ERA, 1.041 WHIP, Cy Young, All Star (10)
Who we got: Vaughn Grissom (0.2 WAR, Angels)

Eduardo Rodriquez (Arizona)

2026 highlights: 4.8 WAR, 16-7, 2.89 ERA, 1.239 WHIP, All Star
Career highlights: 22.7 WAR, 110-73, 1440 Ks, All Star
Who we got: zilch (free agent)

Sonny Gray

2026 highlights: 4.3 WAR, 18-5, 2.72 ERA, 1.158 WHIP
Career highlights: 37.8 WAR, 143-107, 2074 Ks, All Star (3)
Who we gave up: minor leaguers

Why does he always look like he’s wearing his big brother’s uni?

Payton Tolle

2026 highlights: 2.9 WAR, 3.03 ERA, 1.096 WHIP, 171 Ks
Career highlights: pretty much a rookie
Home-grown

Ranger Suarez

2026 highlights: 2.7 WAR, 3.22 ERA, 1.187 WHIP, All Star
Career highlights: 21.1 WAR, 61-42, 3.35 ERA, 1.257 WHIP, 845 Ks, All Star (2)
Who we gave up: zilch (free agent)

Shoulda been Gray

DL – Garrett Crochet

2026 highlights: never mind
Career highlights: 11.3 WAR, 3.17 ERA, 1.118 WHIP, 586 Ks, All Star (2)
Who we gave up: Kye Teel (0.7), Chase Meidroth (4.5), Braden Montgomery (0.3), minor leaguer

On the DL – why do you ask?

Closer

Aroldis Chapman

2026 highlights: 1.9 ERA, 35 saves, 3.22 ERA, 1.187 WHIP, All Star
Career highlights: 26.1 WAR, 63-52, 402 saves, 2.48 ERA, 1.078 WHIP, 1402 Ks, All Star (9)
Who we gave up: zilch (free agent)